by Tessa | Personal Development
3 Step Plan for How To Set and Keep New Year’s Resolutions
Last week I gave you some
Ideas for New Years Resolutions and this week I would like to share some methods for how to keep your New Years resolutions. Because what good is it to set resolutions if you aren’t able to keep them?
As a kid, I loved the first day of school. The new pens and notebooks and binders and paper. New schedule, new classes, new learning possibilities, new goals.
Now that I’m not a student anymore, that’s how I feel about New Years. New calendar. New tax year and savings year. New life possibilities.
I can’t remember the first time I heard about the idea of New Years’ resolutions but I think there is an innate part of me that has always made them and appreciated the process. I’ve been making resolutions as long as I remember.
Here’s the shocking part: I have actually managed to keep my resolutions! Well, most of them anyway.
I’m pretty sure that we have all heard that 80% of people fail at their resolutions by February so what’s the magic formula to be one of the few who can consistently keep new years resolutions?
Having a plan, reviewing it regularly, and taking action.
Resolution: the act of resolving or determining upon an action, course of action, method, procedure, etc.
Resolutions are not meant to be pie-in-the-sky wishes that someday, maybe, hopefully, they will come true. They are meant to take that wish and apply the “how.” You need to figure out what you can do to accomplish that goal or make that dream or hope a reality. Then you resolve to take action toward that goal.
Something like 90% of what we do is done out of habit. So if we want to achieve certain goals or resolutions, the easiest way would be to make the steps towards them into habits.
The simplest method to make your plan is to download my Habit Tracker Workbook. It will walk you through a quick brainstorming session for goal setting in different areas of your life, and then help you figure out how to accomplish that and where to begin.
The workbook also includes a specially designed habit tracker that you can hang up to help you regularly review and allows you to get that satisfaction of checking off that little box each time you take that step forward in action as you begin to succeed at your resolutions. (Bit of neuroscience for you: That little dopamine rush at checking off a box makes you more likely to want to follow through!)
A few simple yet powerful ways to create new habits to help you keep your New Year’s Resolutions:
1. Visual reminders: Write out the habits that you want to create that will get you closer to your goal. Hang them up around your house in areas where you’ll see them and be regularly reminded of what you want to accomplish. Some high traffic places are above the kitchen sink, on the bathroom mirror, on the fridge, near your computer. You could hang up just the paper or even get frames to put them in. My favorite solution is a simple page protector because I can easily switch them out to work on a new habit each month. It also protects the paper from my little people’s hands and from splatter of dishwater.
2. Audio reminders: Most people have a cell phone and nearly all cell phones have an alarm capability. Set an alarm to remind you to about your habit.
3. Physical anchors: Evaluate your day and recognize the things that you do by habit and tie another habit to it. For example, I already drink a coffee each day but want to increase my water intake. So I drink my water before I allow myself a coffee. In an effort to reduce/eliminate pain from a back injury a few years ago, I want to strengthen my core. I’m going to tie core exercises to my husband’s lunch hour (so he can hold the baby).
If you’ve been looking for ideas for new years resolutions, you can check out last weeks post for inspiration and then enter your email to get my free printable habit tracker and workbook. Keep in mind the information you’ve learned in this article (visual reminders, audio reminders, and physical anchors) and you’ll finally be one of the people who can keep your new years resolutions and begin finding peace and success in the New Year.
Once you’ve worked through the habit tracker and workbook, send me an email or leave a comment with the resolution or habit that you think will have the biggest impact.
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by Tessa | Homemaking
I wrote last week about how I am currently in a season of rest. I gladly gave up all the busyness of my previous life when we moved, and I made a purposeful decision not to reignite that path. It’s not that I didn’t enjoy the multiple playdates and friend visits every week. I loved my women’s Bible study and the hours I spend volunteering with new moms. I truly enjoyed my sewing business and doing the marketing and sales for it. I even loved giving the gift of marketing and bookkeeping services for a couple of other local businesses. Not to forget living out my role as a wife and mother.
But it couldn’t last. I was beginning to emotionally, mentally, and physically suffer.
Moving away from nearly all of my family and all of my support system presented me with a unique opportunity to hit the “restart” button. We knew that the farm startup would require a large time investment. I was able to commit the hours needed to parent the children largely on my own while my husband worked long hours and am glad that the farm work I had to do allowed me to bring them with me. They spent a great deal of time in the barns those first 6 months. I wasn’t able to reach out to the community a lot because I knew that my days were not my own. With most mornings spent in the barn, then brunch, housework and naptime, and then late afternoons consisting of chores, supper and then bedtimes, I was left with very few hours to pursue anything off the farm.
In spite of the fact that our days were so busy, we have felt a peace settle over our family. I think this peace came about for several reasons:
1. We are following God’s direction for our lives and His grace sustained (and continues to sustain) us through the transition and all that has come with it. We have had to rely on Him in a whole new way and He has provided more strength than we could have imagined.
2. We were spending more time focusing on just being with our family in our spare time. Partially because we were (are still, actually) so tied to the farm, but also because the family was/is working together toward a common goal. Even the kids sensed the importance of the work and put on their snow gear every morning to help out in the barn.
3. We are at a good stage right now with the kids. After having a very rough couple of years with a difficult pregnancy, my post partum depression and back injury, topped off with a son that took a long time for us to understand, we finally started to get into a good family groove. Days aren’t perfect but, since we aren’t overrun with outside commitments, we are able to meet our children where they’re at.
We are fully aware that things will be turned upside down in a few months as we prepare to introduce a newborn into the picture, and we’re okay with that. We are making preparations with our family rhythm and, more importantly, we are preparing our attitudes. The boys know that the new baby will need lots of attention and they have both eagerly volunteered to help out wherever they are able. We are practicing different housework tasks and, while the 2.5 year old is more limited in the duties he can do, the 5 year old is quite capable of doing nearly everything that I can do in the house.
Our season of rest may be nearing an end, but that doesn’t mean that we need to kick out the Peace that has settled either. I have a feeling that our next season could be entitled “Peace In a Time of Flux.”
by Tessa | Homemaking
It has occured to me how complicated we can make our effort to living simply. We feel that we need to do it all and then some. We read blogs and books and feel like if we aren’t growing everything we eat and making everything we use, we must be doing something wrong. This revelation came to me when I was reading an article on how to simplify your DIY.
Or maybe I’m just talking about myself here. I know that I have a tendency to over complicate things. I have a wonderfully annoying habit of researching the pants off of anything and then trying to dive in head first. I really should remember what my goals are for changing our lifestyle.
I have a number of reasons: frugality, health, appreciating the simple things, teach my kids the importance of work and more. But, when I dream about my goals for my life, I don’t picture money in the bank, or being superfit/healthy. I picture being able to take the time to enjoy my family. Working alongside them without being tied down by the craziness of this world. Slowing down. Peace.
Now I need to ask myself, will what I’m doing lead me to that life? I’m pretty sure that, if I attempted to learn and do everything at once (garden, canning, herbalism, soap making, cheese making, weaving, knitting, sewing, building and wood working and the list goes on) that I would just burn out. We are not designed to do it all. And very few people are able to dive in head first without drowning. That doesn’t sound very peaceful to me.
So, instead of my grand plan for our garden this year, I managed to move one step further than last year. The only vegetables I planted were tomatoes and carrots. Oh, and onions because I saw an idea on pinterest and thought it would be a simple way to use up the space where I planted my chamomile (that didn’t come up). I planted in containers because I figured it made sense to have a portable garden due to our impending move. I watered with a bucket from my kitchen sink because I have no faucet on my house. And I watched and waited. I did very minimal weeding (one of my favorite parts of container gardening) and only a little bit of fertilizing.
My garden took about 10 minutes to care for every couple of days and I didn’t lose my mind. I learned a lot about growing tomatoes and carrots. I didn’t get a huge and bountiful crop this year but I did manage to learn enough to point me in the right direction for next year’s garden.
Next year my goal is small: plant enough of a garden so I don’t need to buy veggies through the growing season. If that goes well, the year after next I’ll plant enough so that we can store some for the winter.
But, for now, 10 minutes extra into my schedule is simple. Because simplifying should be simple to do.Another couple great posts that I have recently read that are great grounders when you’re feeling overwhelmed or like you’re not doing enough:
How Do you Know When You Are Natural Enough? (Cheeky Bums Blog)
dear sweet mom who feels like she is failing (Finding Joy)
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