by Tessa | Motherhood
It isn’t hard to make play dough. It uses very few ingredients and takes only about 10 minutes from start to finish and provides countless hours of fun for my kids. So why do I make such a big deal over it?
I asked myself these questions last week as I watched my boys try to stick together play dough that was half dried out and kept falling apart.
My list of excuses:
I’m so tired today.
I’ll make some later today.
l doubt I have the right ingredients.
They will want to help and I’ll have a big mess to clean up.
They are still enjoying the crumbly stuff.
The truth:
I’m tired everyday.
I most likely wouldn’t get around to it later.
I probably do have ingredients and the least I could do is check.
So? There is going to be mess made today anyway If not in the kitchen, then in other areas of the house.
It would make them so happy to have new playdough that is easier for them to build things with.
As I had that inner dialogue and shot down each of my own excuses, I prayed. I asked God for the energy and oomph to to get out of the rocking chair, lay down my sleeping baby (and be okay with the fact that he would likely wake up sooner than if I was holding him) and go to my kitchen. I don’t always listen to God’s prompting but then I was reminded by a still, small Voice that, last month, I made a commitment to pursue the hearts of my children.
So I did it.
I’m sure there was just as much cheering in Heaven as there was in my house when the boys discovered what I was doing. Cheering for their happiness as well as cheering for my small triumph. God even blessed me with Baby Bear sleeping in his seat for awhile so I resisted the temptation to check a few things off of my to do list so I could play with my bigger boys. After I had rocked Baby Bear back to sleep, I had the entertainment of 2 little boys and their creative imaginations:
There were 10 invisible puppies involved who lived in the wall and got a ride to town for ice cream in Bumblebee
and Heatwave
(affiliate link to a couple of my kids’ favorite gifts from this past Christmas). Biscuit even asked the puppies to help him put the playdough away at tidy time. He held the bag open for them to put the playdough in. It was great in theory but then the puppies jumped in the bag instead. They only came out to jump on Papa Bear’s head and eat ice cream. The puppies have visited every day since then and continue to be a great source of imaginative play, even without the playdough.
Another benefit of making playdough that day is the renewed motivation it gave me to spend purposeful time with my children, in their world. They have asked me more often these last days to play with them. And I’ve been saying “yes” more often (though I did have to draw the line at digging in the giant snow pile because it just doesn’t seem safe to do that with Baby Bear in the sling).
I’m pursuing the hearts of my children by having a daily focus time, joining them in whatever they are playing. And you know what? I’m relearning how to play and it’s kind of fun!
What kind of play have you joined your children in lately?
by Tessa | Motherhood
My parents screwed up when they were raising me. They yelled at me and spanked me (a couple times). They disrespected my thoughts and opinions. I was raised by imperfect parents, and it affected me and my ability to parent. I’ve screwed up already with raising my boys.
I did not like my kids last night. Both C and Biscuit. I got so mad at them for their disobedience and the way they were treating each other. It was the end of the day, I was tired, and I reacted poorly. And then I looked at Baby Bear sleeping contentedly on my chest and felt my heart burst with peace and love for him. He’s perfect. He adores me. I can easily fill all of his needs. He’s quiet and never talks back or disobeys me. But it won’t last. It’s a scary thought that one day I will probably feel that all-to-familiar anger toward him as well.
I’m a sinner, raised by sinners, raising sinners. It’s a recipe for disaster.
The truth is that perfection is impossible. Thankfully, God doesn’t require perfection from us. Instead, He gives us grace. Grace: the free and unmerited power to save a person from sins. My boys will overcome the things that I do wrong with them, just like I am overcoming the things my parents did wrong with me. Through God’s grace. God overcame sin so we didn’t have to. This doesn’t give us permission to damage our children by the way we parent, rather, it allows us the freedom to allow the Holy Spirit to work through us. We are free to parent the way that He has called us to. He will be made perfect in our weakness.
We need to admit we aren’t perfect and stop believing the lie that we need to be. Admit that we make mistakes, even admit to our children that we are just as much sinners as they are. Ask them for forgiveness when we mess up.
The shackles of our ancestors and upbringing exist. Sin exists. We will always battle it but, praise the Lord, we do not battle alone. We can overcome imperfect parenting. The outcome is not of our doing. It is by the grace of God that we have happy, adjusted children. There is hope for them, in spite of our imperfections.
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by Tessa | Homemaking
When my husband and I were both working full time, our meals consisted of a lot of prepackaged foods. Canned soups, frozen pizza, hashbrowns, mac n cheese, cereal etc. I didn’t have a lot of recipes under my belt and didn’t enjoy cooking (still not my favorite thing to do) so we took a lot of shortcuts in the kitchen. Shortcuts are most definitely not how to eat healthier.
When I got pregnant, I wanted to improve my diet. So I added a lot more fruits and veggies than I used to eat but, due to my work schedule, I often had to eat supper in the vehicle. Drive-throughs were so convenient. Mmmm poutine!
Then C was born. I was still making slow improvements to my diet but it was tough since my husband wasn’t really on board. C was exclusively breastfed until 6 months old, when we first introduced him to solid foods, in the form of pureed carrots. Jarred food had too many additives for my liking so I avoided them. It wasn’t long before C moved past purees and he wanted to start sharing foods from my plate. That’s when we discovered the simplest and more beneficial tip to finding healthy foods in the grocery store:
Read labels.
There are numerous articles on how to read food labels and exactly which ingredients to avoid and which ingredients do what to your body. It’s confusing, to say the least. The “Ah Ha” moment came when my husband and I were comparing ingredients on a couple bags of hashbrowns. One had about 15 ingredients and one had about 6 ingredients. We bought the one with 6.
Typically, less ingredients is better. Also, if you can’t pronounce the ingredients, they probably aren’t good for you.
Carrots = good.
Milk = good.
Eggs = good.
Rice = good.
Eat foods in as close to their natural state as possible and your body will thank you. That’s the easiest starting point to improving what you are putting into your body.
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What is the easiest tip that you have for someone who wants to eat healthier or head toward a healthier lifestyle?
Edited to add: Yes, I do realize my photo has a spelling mistake. And no, I won’t be fixing it at this point. Too much work and I think you get the point anyway 🙂
by Tessa | Faith
I spent some time reflecting on the past year as I made my Life Plan for 2014 and our sermon yesterday was a review of some of the congregations blessings over the past year. I’ve had “Count Your Blessings” stuck in my head all day. So here are some of my favorite memories and blessings of 2013 (in no particular order):
- The birth of my third son. What an unbelievable experience! He is 7 weeks old now and has made such a seamless entry into our lives.
- Hiring a close friend to work with us on the farm and having him and his wife and kids move just down the road. I love having a friend 5 minutes down the road and their whole family has been such a blessing with the extra help on the farm, support for when I had Baby Bear, and friends for my own boys to play with.
- A bountiful harvest. There is something to be said for irrigated fields. We have never, in all the years we have been farming, seen such an amazing harvest. And God protected our fields from the crazy weather too!
- A new brother-in-law. It wasn’t the prettiest process but my sister-in-law’s new husband is a wonderful addition to the family. And he brought with him two incredible new nieces, who I hope will learn to love our family as much as we already love them.
- The best family Christmas in the last decade. After many years of … upside down Christmases, Hubby and I both truly enjoyed spending time with both sides of our family as well as having more intimate celebrations with our own three boys.
- A new vehicle. I can’t say enough how much I love our GMC Acadia. Not only is it perfect for our family’s needs, it is a truly beautiful machine on the inside and the out. It is the first new vehicle I have ever owned and I feel so blessed to call it my own.
- Miracles and progress on the farm. We went through quite an adventure with moving a whole herd of cattle plus all the machinery last winter and much of this year was spent trying to figure out the new system and farming rhythm here. It wasn’t always easy and it was a steep learning curve but God answered our prayers and we are finally feeling like things are headed in the right direction.
- A church family that completely enveloped my family into their fold. We weren’t able to attend regularly throughout the year (partially due to farm work and partially due to our own fatigue after a long, hard week) but the congregation continually greeted us like we were old friends, with no judgement. It is very exciting to be at a place in our lives when church attendance can become more regular and we are able to leave feeling refreshed in both heart and spirit.
- Growth in my marriage. After 9.5 years of marriage, Hubby and I are closer than we have ever been. It is truly a God-thing to grow closer in spite of the busyness of the last year. Or perhaps it is because of it. I love being on the same page as him when it comes to goals for our family and the farm.
- My own spiritual growth. I’m actually excited to read my Bible. My post partum depression (from after my second son was born) has been defeated. I’m singing in worship again. But most importantly, God has convicted me of the importance of pursuing Him, for both my own sake as well as my family’s.
This year had led our whole family on an adventure of ups and downs and has taught us, once again, that God is in control and the only way to make it through any season of life is to fully rely on Him.
What are some of your favorite memories or blessings of 2013? How are you allowing the lessons you’ve learned in 2013 shape your 2014?
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Time-Warp Wife Ben & Me
by Tessa | Homemaking
One of our household mantras go like this:
How do we behave?
Polite and Gentle and show each other Love.
We first started this when my oldest was learning how to properly pronounce an “L.” It encouraged him to repeat words with the “L” at the beginning, middle, and end of the word. It was an added bonus that it also included a character lesson.
In spite of the fact that my boys are typically less rambunctious in their play than one would expect from boys their age, we do have a tendency toward more intensity when it comes to emotions. With the addition of another little boy to our family last week (more on that later), we are in the midst of the extra dose of fatigue and attempts at finding a new family rhythm. Gentleness is a habit that we need to get back into.
One of the things that has helped serve as a reminder for gentleness was to light a candle and say a prayer for my home. C and Biscuit help me light (or remind me to light) the candle and I explain why I’m lighting it and pray out loud for peace in our home and gentleness toward each other. I love having a visual (and scented!) reminder and we hold each other accountable treating each other with love. Yes, I allow my children to call me out when I treat them unacceptably.
I know that there are a lot more ways to increase the habit of gentleness but I’m starting with my candle and prayer. It’s simple. And, with a newborn in my arms, simple is about as good as I can do!
Do you have any other simple ways for increasing gentleness in yourself and your children?
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