by Tessa | Homemaking
Typically, the words “unchooling” and “planning” do not show up in the same sentence. So how can I claim to be an unschooler and still be scouring the internet for information on how to plan a homeschooling year?
C is 5 this year and, even though kindergarten isn’t mandatory where I live, I have decided to register with a homeschool board. I did this for a couple of reasons:
1. To get people off my back about his education. Everyone is asking me what we’re doing so now I can tell them he’s registered as a homeschooler. It just eliminates some of the much-repeated questions I receive.
2. To give a school board a “trial run.” I know that I want to homeschool but I don’t know exactly what it will all entail, as far as there being required records or plans, or what a meeting with a facilitator would look like, or what a homeschool board will offer in terms of support/guidance.
Back to the whole “planned unschool” idea.
I used to be a schedule-a-holic. My days were planned down to the minute (including time for inevitable interruptions like traffic or getting stopped by a chatty co-worker). I loved it and thrived. It reduced a lot of stress in my hectic life/career and helped me accomplish more than I would have if I wasn’t a planner and list maker.
5 years ago: enter baby #1. He was on his own schedule (of nursing for about 30 minutes every 1-2 hours and not sleeping longer than a two hour stretch until about 18 months). It didn’t match mine. I retired from my business and significantly slowed down my pace so I would be better able to meet his needs. It was an amazing season of growth, trust, and learning priorities. Everything else could wait. My son could/would not. He was about 2.5 before he finally settled into what most of society would consider a decent routine. Which allowed me to settle my life into a bit of routine again. Until his brother was born a couple months after that. Thrown into chaos, any semblance of a rhythm or routine eluded me. Fast forward another couple of years and we moved away from everyone we knew and, consequently, all outside of the home commitments. The first few months were hectic as there was a lot of extra work on the farm which made scheduling anything rather difficult.
A few months ago I started reading about home management binders on Pinterest and became a little obsessed with finding a way to work a planner back into my life. The boys are at a stage where they spend much of their time playing together happily outside, which means that I have more time to figure out things like a housekeeping and time management system that will suit our ever-fluctuating family rhythm. I have been running my home management binder (a “lite” version compared to some of the other ones out there) for a couple months and it has made a huge difference for my family.
I am in the process of figuring out a loose routine that will allow me to have lots of breaks to sit a nurse the baby or change diapers and such, but will also encourage me to stay on top of things in my household, including encouraging the interests of my children. I’m not there yet, but I’m praying about it regularly and the pieces are starting to come together. Including the pieces that require me to be very involved with my boys’ interests and assisting them in furthering those interests, through various methods. Though I’m not planning any curriculum for them, they still deserve my focused attention. Their interests are important to them and, therefore, they are important to me. And kids spell love T-I-M-E. So that’s what I am planning to give them.
by Tessa | Homemaking
If this is the first time you’ve have heard about the news I’m about to share, I apologize. I wish I could tell everyone personally instead of having them find out in such an impersonal manner. But I can’t and the deadline is coming closer. So here’s my big news:
We are moving.
We are moving about 3.5 hours away but we have family, friends, and other ties to our current area so we will be back on a pretty regular basis. We bought a farm and are doing some barn renovations down there so things have been pretty hectic lately. Lots of trips down there to arrange renos and prepare the farm for animals and much more needs to be done. So there is a lot of work to be done and I’ve been doing what I can to prepare my family.
This includes things like figuring out internet, grocery stores, mail, banking, church information, kids activitiesc and mommy groups. I’ve also been trying to visualize how we will live in the new place. The house we are going to live in down there has about 200 square feet less space than here. Not a big deal for bedrooms but the main floor of the house is something else. It’s proving to be a tough layout to work with. For example, the “coat closet” is inside the bathroom and the space for the fridge is in the laundry room. I think that we have figured out how we can make our belongings work and I know that God will provide the peace and patience we need to live in that house for the time being. Due to the down sizing, we have had to make some tough decisions. We won’t have the space or storage that we do in our current house (there are only 3 closets in the whole house) so we are getting rid of stuff.
It is amazing how much stuff a person can accumulate. I filled a garbage bag with toys to donate and I packed some of the less popular toys. The boys haven’t missed them. They are actually sitting in a clear plastic bin on a shelf in the playroom and neither boy has asked for them to play with in the whole 6 weeks they have been packed. I may have to donate them as well. I have noticed that since I packed up a good number of toys (the boys play outside most of the time anyway) that I don’t have nearly as many issues getting them to clean up. I’m not tripping on toys the way I used to either. I like that!
I have also taken this opportunity to simplify other areas of our life. I packed about half of our dinnerware. I do still have extra plastic plates/bowls for snack times but we mostly haven’t missed the extra dinnerware. I have been doing way less dishes. I have a dishwasher but I used to wash all the plastics and pots and larger items by hand because the dishwasher was always full with plates. Now I can fit nearly every dirty dish and pot into the dishwasher and just run it every other day. It takes me 20 minutes to do dishes and clean the kitchen in the morning instead of 1.5 hours. The only issue I’ve run into with this is that my husband was upset that both large coffee mugs were dirty and he didn’t want to use a medium one so he didn’t drink his coffee one day.
Things I have already packed/donated: DVDs (we watch Netflix once in a while but that’s about it), books (just kept a couple out that I will read before the move), baby gear (lent it to my sister actually), all of the kids’ clothes that they don’t currently wear (plus most of what actually fits them too – less laundry!) and a lot of my clothes (sad yet freeing to donate all my nice business clothes I used before I became a SAHM, they can bless someone else).
Next areas to simplify/pack: towels (probably leave 1 towel per son, 1 for me, and 2 for hubby), computer gear (we have extras of nearly everything), some fabric (I have to face the fact that I won’t have time to sew it all before the move).
So preparing to move has given me a great opportunity to live with less. It has shown me that we really do have an abundance of “stuff” that we don’t really need. I’m not at the point that I could get rid of it all but I certainly am looking at things differently. I still have a bin with clothes that fit my boys because I know that they (especially my 4 year old) will wear out a couple pairs of pants before they outgrow them. I can just go to the bin to grab a “new” pair. I know that we will eventually have company over for dinner and will require those extra plates. So I’ll just go to the box to grab them. But the won’t go into my regular rotation because I don’t want to be a slave to my stuff. I don’t enjoy dishes or laundry so I’m going to keep it to a minimum.
Less stuff really does translate into more time!
Is there an area in your life and household that you can simplify? Ask yourself, do you really need that stuff or can you do with less?
by Tessa | Personal Development
In the midst of
Pinterest,
Facebook fan pages and all of the really great blogs and articles out there, it is very easy to get overwhelmed and intimidated when it comes to making lifestyle changes. It seems like everyone else is living the lifestyle that you want and, if they can do it, why can’t you? I think it is fair to say that we read all these great ideas, see all these projects ideas, organizational techniques, and recipes, and we don’t know where to begin. So we don’t ever begin. We don’t ever move ahead.There are many areas that I want to change for my family. I’ll give you a partial list:
Food:
- Make bread weekly (from flour I grow and grind myself)
- Make yogurt weekly
- Make cheese quarterly
- Make butter monthly
- Cook healthy dinners from scratch
- Raise chickens for the eggs
- Tap trees to make maple syrup
- Homemade vanilla coffee creamer
- Homemade pasta
- Make freezer meals monthly
- Well stocked pantry so I can do one-a-month shopping instead of weekly
Garden:
- Tomatoes
- Carrots
- Herbs: garlic, basil, thyme, rosemary, ginger, chives, calendula, motherwort, St Johns Wort, chamomille, mint, lavander, plantain, comfy, lemongrass, hyssop
- Lettuce
- Cucumber
- Broccoli
- Cauliflour
- Strawberries
- Raspberries
- Apple trees
Home:
- Always clean enough to have company over
- Decorated and matching furniture
- Declutter – clothes, toys, books, and kitchen stuff
- Wood burning fireplace
- Organized bookshelves
- Chemical free cleaning and body care (toothpaste, deodorant, shampoo etc)
- Line dry laundry
- Build my dream home for my family
Christian Living:
- Attend church every week
- Read the Bible through every year
- Keep a prayer/miracles journal
- Have a Bible study journal
- Study scripture with my family
- Memorize passages regularly
- Have regular a family worship time
Education:
- Read daily something to expand my mind in a subject of interest
- Read daily to my children
- Write and publish a book (or two)
- Learn a few languages
Business:
- Meet my sling sales goals every month
- Do 1-2 trade shows per year
- Get 1000 followers on my blog by the time I write/publish my book
- Get the farm to the point that Adam can take regular days off
Family:
- Two weekends of camping every year
- One family “field trip” per month
- One date with Adam per month
- Institute a weekly family games night
- Crafts with the kids weekly
That is a long list. And that is not even the complete list! If I look at my complete list I can get very overwhelmed. I think that if I actually was doing everything on my list then even I would not want to read my blog! The reality is that I’m more like you: big dreams that I haven’t followed through on.
Instead of focusing on what I’m not doing, I’m going to fill you in on a little secret. This secret revolutionized the way that I look at my life goals. And now for the cliff hanger: I’m going to put it in another post because this one is getting too long. Stay tuned!
In the meantime, I have a challenge for you: Grab a pen and piece of paper. Make your own list. Break it into different areas of your life and list (in as much detail as possible) how you want those areas to look and what you want to accomplish in those areas.
by Tessa | Homemaking
I am scatterbrained. I am one if those people that will run out to the car and back to the house 3 times because I forget things like keys, diaper bag, and once even the baby. True story! Don’t worry, I realized I didn’t have him before I actually reached the car and, in all fairness, he was only a couple months old so I was still new to the mothering thing.
I can also be a perfectionist. This is a very bad combination. I am not one of those people that is a natural born housekeeper. Though I crave organization, I find it very difficult to achieve.
I used to be organized. When I was a child, I made my bed every morning and placed all my stuffed animals in their proper spots on my bed. When it was bedtime, I placed those same stuffed animals on the floor surrounding my bed to they could “guard” as I slept (I have no idea why I thought I needed their protection through the night). I was up at 6am so I could do my homework in peace, tidy my room, and have a really great (and long) shower. Life was great when all I had to do was organize my stuffies.
My whole adult life has been much more chaotic. It didn’t help that when I moved out of my parents’ house and became a home manager and wife all in the same breath. I had done my chores growing up but I really had no idea how to run a household.
Insert several years of floundering with household management (everything except the financial end anyway, I have always been good with budgeting).
Insert baby #1 and becoming a SAHM. Soon my son began to crawl and keeping my floors clean became my number one priority. Then he began to eat solids and cooking became a necessity. I started scraping by. Eventually I became pregnant again and realized that as excited as I was about it, I had no idea how I was going to add another child into my wonderful life and crazy household.
I read somewhere that if you have
less stuff then you have less stuff to take care of. So we dejunked. It was a little bit easier (I didn’t have to show people a “junk room” when I gave them the grand tour) but housekeeping was still tough. Correction, it
is still tough. I used to feel embarassed about my home and did the “mad woman cleaning blitz” anytime a friend came over. I also tried to avoid inviting people over to my house as often as possible and would go to their house to visit instead (some of my friends are nodding their heads while they read this, realizing they have never, or rarely, seen my home). About a year ago, I realized this was silly.
My mom told me this (true) story one time: Mom had three little kids (a total of less than 3.5 years between the oldest and youngest) and had just moved. There was something about kitchen renovations going on as well. Her friend called her and let my mom know that she was on her way to visit. As much as mom looked forward to seeing this friend, she looked around her kitchen with horror. This friend was a little bit of a neat freak. To the point that she was bordering on OCD. Mom panicked. She hadn’t fully moved in yet so several cupboards were still empty. So all the dirty pots, pans, and dishes got stuffed in the cupboards and she closed the doors. A quick wipe of the counter and the kitchen looked spotless. Mom was feeling pretty good about the whole thing.
In walks her friend.
Keep in mind that this was a new (to us) home. This friend is OCD about dirt and dust. This friend is also kind of a snooper. So she started opening the kitchen cupboards. One by one she opened, looked inside, and shut the door. Mom held her breath and tried to think of a way to distract her friend. Her friend opened the cupboards with the dirty dishes, looked, didn’t say a word, and closed them again.
Moral of the story: If this particular friend of my mom (and believe me when I say her own house is immaculate and pretty much always has been) didn’t say anything about the dirty dishes in the cupboard, chances are none of your friends are going to say anything about the dust on your TV or the sand on your floors of the dishes in your sink. Because trust me when I say we all have it. Even my most organized friends have dirt on their floors.
The bad news: My home is not perfect and never will be. The good news: I’m getting better. I am slowly building a system that works for me. A system that helps me track what I need to do on a regular basis but gives me enough flexibility for when life hiccups and my schedule is no longer my own. I can’t begin to describe the freedom that I have knowing that I don’t have to clean the bathroom today because it is on the docket for Monday. And isn’t that what having a clean home is really about, freedom? Mental, physical and even spiritual freedom?
So tell me, are you naturally organized or do your flounder and scrape by? Or better yet, have you found a system that works for you and your family?
