When I originally had the idea of writing on consistency, I thought that this post would be about consistency in your mothering and discipline techniques. About following through when telling your child to do something. As I started writing, however, I was led in a completely different direction. This is about my struggle with consistency in the service of motherhood.
My mind has been cloudy lately. My body has been weary. I’m nearing the end of my pregnancy and, to be frank, I’m pretty sick of waking up to pee 2-3 times per night and having to maneuver gingerly out of bed so as not to aggravate my pelvic pain. I’m thankful that, for the last couple of weeks, Biscuit has only been up 2-3 times per night and has settled back to sleep quickly.
I want to be a blessing to my husband and children. I know the “to dos” to get there but I’m having a hard time getting motivated. I cannot rely on my own strength, because it so often fails me. I’m consistently inconsistent. Just when I feel like I’m getting into a good rhythm with housework, mothering, my marriage, and business, I drop the ball. What’s a person to do at that point?
Go back to square one.
Square one is to read my Bible and pray. I didn’t get my Bible reading in for a couple mornings last week. It completely threw my day off. I don’t know how much of it was the lack of the Word and focused time with God, or the lack of structure at the beginning of the day.
Service. Jesus came to serve and He is the example that we are to follow. Servanthood is hard. Especially at this point in my life, I would much rather be served than to serve. I even feel like I’m entitled to being served sometimes. I do a lot of serving and, to tell the truth, I grow weary from it. But nowhere in the Bible does it say that we are to serve with the expectation of being served back. How in the world does a person serve and sacrifice so much of herself, consistently every day, without growing weary? You can’t. I can’t. I need to find a way to rely on God’s strength instead of my own. Because there are days when I just run out of strength.
Go back to the beginning. Square one: read my Bible. Keep reading until I allow God’s strength to come into me. He will give me the strength. All I need to do is ask in faith and I shall receive. But I also have to be willing and open to receiving it. How do I open myself up to His strength? Prayer. God’s strength is found in His Word and made perfect in my weakness. His perfect strength will see me through.
Please fill me with Your strength. I can’t go on without it. I need you. I can’t do this alone. I don’t want to rely on my faltering strength. Open my heart and mind to being used by You to bless my family today. And fill me with the strength to follow through.
Do you struggle with consistency too? How do you find the strength to consistently serve your family?
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