Why I Don’t Keep a Clean House (And Neither Should You)

Why I Don’t Keep a Clean House (And Neither Should You)

Why I Don’t Keep a Clean House (And Neither Should You)

I may scare a few people off my confessing this but I’ll confess anyway: I don’t keep a clean house. It isn’t a goal I’m heading toward. In fact, having a perfectly clean house is not even on my radar. What? Isn’t that everyone’s goal? Isn’t that the role of a homemaker? The answer comes in the form of a big, fat, NO!

organization and homemaking is hard but you don't actually have to keep your entire house clean

You’ll never be satisfied if you try to keep your entire home clean. It’s just not going to happen because you live here! Instead, focus on getting one area clean at a time. Some areas can be clean once per week (or month or year) and some areas can have a clean moment daily. My kitchen table is an area that I try to clean once a day. Sometimes it’s first thing in the morning and then the kids do puzzles or drive cars on it. Sometimes it’s right before supper so I can set the table for supper. Sometimes we eat at a table with last night’s rice still on it and I clean it after the kids have gone to bed. It is clean for probably 15 minutes per day maximum. But I’m okay with that.

You’ll never be satisfied if you try to keep your entire home clean. It’s just not going to happen because you live here! Instead, focus on getting one area clean at a time.

organization and homemaking is hard but you don't actually have to keep your entire house clean

I try to clean my floors once per week. I don’t have a very big house and we don’t have a lot of toys so, if everyone (read: my husband, who pumps up the boys to help out) chips in, it only take about 15-30 minutes to tidy the floors enough so I can sweep. Sometimes I mop. And then the kids run in and out of the house with dirty feet. The next day the toys and sand are all over the floor again.

My sink has a dish brush, coffee grounds, and a few dishes in it. I try to clean it once per day but we use our sink. It is pretty much never empty because, as soon as I do clean it, it’s snack time and strawberry and banana covered knives and plates get put in there. Or my husband makes coffee and rinses out the reusable coffee filter. Or I find a cup of yesterday’s leftover milk to dump in there.

The goal is not to keep your home clean. The goal is to GET it that way. And then move on. Let it go. Know that it will be messy and dirty again. And that’s okay. So give yourself grace. Pick your area to focus on that can be cleaned right now. And accept that you are cleaning it up simply to be a clean canvas for your life. A clean slate for new creativity. Whether it be for supper, race tracks, or morning coffee. That’s just life. And life is messy and dirty.

If you really struggle, I highly recommend you check out my free 5 day email challenge. Instead of staying stuck in the messy and overwhelming, you can take a few simple actions each day to transform your home. You’ll get both action steps as well as scripture and prayer prompts to help you get motivated to actually follow through. 

Comment below to let me know what one area you can stay focused on or how you’re planning to let go a bit and breath easier.

 

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Introverted Unschooling

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Introverted Unschooling

It’s not that we don’t enjoy visiting and going out, we do, it’s just that, as an introverted mother with a couple of introverted children (and a couple of extroverts too) we enjoy staying at home too.
Late morning and my 9 year old is reading a novel beside me on the couch and my 6 and 3 year old are playing quietly in the play area with the marble run. The 4 week old is sleeping on my chest and I’m typing this out on my phone. A bit earlier the 3 bigger boys went outside while I sat on the couch with a sleeping newborn listening to podcasts (this position is the one I hold most of the time lately). The afternoon will probably look very similar, though I’ll get a nap in and maybe finish folding that basket of laundry I started with yesterday.

 

Our trips outside the home this week included about an hour to town for a chiropractor appointment for me and visiting friends Friday morning. That’s truly it. We didn’t go to church last Sunday and didn’t need to do groceries this week. We don’t have classes or co-ops or more than one playdate per week. And our home is filled with an incredible peace.

We don’t have classes or co-ops or more playdates. And our home is filled with an incredible peace.

Jamie from Simple Homeschool wrote a great post with 15 resolutions for being an introverted homeschool mom that I printed out at still refer to regularly. Her third resolution is about honoring the person God created you to be. I think that unschooling lends itself well to being an introvert because I don’t need to pressure my kids to do things and my main job is to facilitate and observe. My role is to learn about my children so I can parent them in the way that they need.
What is one thing that have been adding to your or your children’s schedule because you feel you “should” be doing it? Are you brave enough to let it go?
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Life Plan 2014: April Summary

Life Plan 2014: April Summary

I didn’t get my March Summary goals post up. The second half of March consisted or a round robin of a yucky cold virus. It hit each member of our family, even Baby Bear, and made for a not-so-fun few weeks. April has felt like a new start. A new season. A new day. Baby Bear is the first of my children who is not high need and he still has a really consistent routine. The biggest perk: I’m rested. I make sure to go to bed on time and we still deal with multiple night wakings but it’s amazing how a content and peace-filled family can show each other love during the day. If your family doesn’t enjoy each other’s company, there is no quick fix but I can say that slowing down and resting more will get you further in life that running around and hardly allowing yourselves to breath.

A new season, a new quarter, a new day. Life Plan 2014: April Summary - Aimed at the Heart

Goal updates:

Faith:

Read the Bible in one year: I got very far behind in March but am almost caught up. Doubling up the reading on some days and getting back into the habit of listening daily. I’m currently in 1 Kings for OT and making my way through the Book of John for my NT readings.
In depth book study: Oh, right. I was supposed to be reading Ephesians…. I’m going to be caught up soon on my yearly plan so I’ll stick this back into the rotation.
Focused Daily prayer time: I’ve been more sporadically praying for people and events as I think of them instead of taking a specific time each day. Trying to think of when I could add this in. Last month I mentioned a prayer prompter. Still haven’t made it. Putting it on my To Do list right now though… Scheduled for my Sunday afternoon planning session.

Wife:

Monthly “out” date with Adam: No dates. We did errands together without the bigger boys. But they took too long and we didn’t actually sit down to focus on each other. I just mentioned this fact to my husband and C has already figured out he’s going to call a friend to watch him and his brother. I’m glad that even my son sees the value in it… friend texted and May’s date is scheduled.
Shared interest “doing something” time: He totally out paced me in the game that we were playing and I have been left in the dust. This month’s “doing something” involves a garden and a plan for yard work. I want it done and he actually enjoy most yard work.
Kiss Adam daily: So simple and yet, with all the sickness we had in March, we completely got out of the habit. I didn’t review my goals at the end of March either so we really have some work to make this a priority again.

Mother:

Play: Can I just say that my kids are awesome? They truly are fun to be with and, even though I don’t usually get down on the floor with them to push cars around, I love spending time with them. With the weather having (finally) warmed up, we have been taking a lot of walks and doing story time outside and we have been making good use of the swingset. Baby Bear isn’t to sure about swinging but he sure does love participating with the big boys.
Their faith: We did pretty good with out daily family Bible readings for a while but then slacked again. I’m trying to figure out how to make this a firmer habit. Do you have any suggestions? Perhaps a visual chart by our dinner table that we can add stickers to each day we read. Kids love stickers!

Homemaker:

Cleaning: I feel like I’m getting the hang of this whole housekeeping-with-3-kids thing. Baby Bear is about 5.5 months so that’s quicker than I adjusted with the first two. My house certainly isn’t perfect but I’m also not overwhelmed anymore. It’s like a breath of fresh air to not feel like I’m always running behind.
Food: Freezer cooking? Baking? Yogurt? What’s that? I have been making kombucha so that’s a benefit to out health. I also have my tomatoes, peppers, and broccoli started and we will plant the rest of the garden in a couple of weeks.
Project: March’s project was to plan my garden and I still need to do that. April’s project was to clean my bay window so I could start my seeds and put them there. May’s project is to plant everything that can be planted in May. I didn’t plant a lot of things on time last year so my harvest was rather pitiful. This year will be different!

Hobbies/Blog/Personal:

The OIler's Handbook Reading: Two non-fiction books in April were The Essential Oiler’s Handbook. I have used essential oils for the last few years but we had a real breakthrough with Biscuit and his emotional issues during sleep (perhaps I’ll write about that in more detail one day) so I started doing a ton of research. I read about 6 ebooks on essential oils and that was the best. Another one I really liked was The Aromatherapy Bible: The Definitive Guide to Using Essential Oils. It is not a Christian book and there are a few things that I don’t agree with in it but it has great tips for recipes and how to use oils. My favorite part of the book is the section that is dedicated to an overview of a ton of different oils. My fiction selection was The Swiss Courier by Tricia Goyer. The kindle version is cheaper than I could have driven to the library and back.  I have read another couple of books by Tricia and read her blog regularly and just love her writing. This book was no exception. It was a WW II book and I haven’t been able to read a WW II book for a number of years because I found that they affected me too much. I took a chance on this book, however, and I’m so glad I did. Fantastic story that left me on the edge of my seat and had me applauding by the end of it. I rate this book 5 out of 5 stars.
Writing: I have been pretty consistently writing daily. Not always something for my blog but I journal and have even done something that I hadn’t done for probably 15 years: I wrote a song. Or rather, a part of a song. It isn’t quite complete. It has been great to get back at the piano and have the mental capacity and the joy in my heart to be able to write music again.
Website: March’s goal of making a disclosure page is going to be completed in May. I want to give a little more information on how and why I decided to monetize my blog and how those kinds of things affect my writing and how they affect you, as a reader.
Blog: My regular readers will know that March was a tough month for posting but I’m getting things organized again and I am enjoying posting regularly again. The thing with a blog is that it’s never just writing. If all I had to do was write, I could post daily. The truth is, as any blogger will tell you, the photos and links and formatting and marketing all take up more time than the actual writing does. I put a lot of time, effort, and heart into my final project so if a post really resonates with you, please share it!
Planning Session: I missed a few of these due to sick kids and Sunday’s spent away from home. I had to do some very quick and sporadic planning on Sunday evenings or Monday mornings and the hurried planning showed. I really love my planning session because it helps me organize my thoughts on all the areas of my life. I can accomplish so much more when I have a game plan.
Quiet time: I love warmer weather. I skip out of the house a bit when my husband comes in to make lunch. I get to take a walk alone or, occasionally, with a sleeping baby on my back. The boys play outside a lot so all the noise is out there. I can put Baby Bear in his little chair on the deck and he sleeps or watches his brothers and I can relax. Feeling much more refreshed with the amount of quiet I’ve been experiencing.

Health: Drinking water: It is much easier to keep my fluids up when the weather is nice. A cool glass of water on a hot day is perfect. I would say that I’ve got this “drinking water daily” habit in the bag. Eating fruit: Fruit and summer go hand-in-hand. And my boys have started asking for fruit at snack time so I prepare their snack and make an extra plate for myself at the same time. Strengthening my back: My back injury was over 3 years ago now and it still gives me grief. It makes me a little sad to think it but, at the same time, it has improved drastically. I am starting to find a routine of essential oils, back stretching exercises and remembering to massage daily (my chiropractor recommended the Professional Body Massager and I love it). My back still pops out daily and gets tired easily but it doesn’t usually hurt. I’m so glad that pain is minimized! Reviewing goals regularly helps keep you headed in the right direction.

Do you have a regular time to review your goals? If you have written a blog post on your goals, we would love to have you link up and share your goals with us. You could grab the button and put it on your post to help spread the word that we are writing these posts. Or leave a comment with a summary of how your life plan for 2014 is coming along.

*This post may contain affiliate links. If you follow the link and choose to make a purchase, I may receive a small referral commission, at no extra cost to you.*
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Life Plan 2014: January Summary

Life Plan 2014: January Summary

Life Plan 2014: January Sumary (With an awesome goal setting accountability link up!) - AImed at the Heart
Disclosure: This post contains affiliate link which means if you purchase something by clicking on the link, I get a small referral commission, at no cost to you.

Back in December I let you know about a Goals Blogging link up that I’m involved in and shared a bit about the process I used to make my life plan. I don’t normally share my goals because I feel they are very personal, but I know how much I benefit from reading what other people are (or are not) accomplishing in their lives so I thought it beneficial to share my progress with you this year.

Without further ado, I’ll jump right in:

Faith:

Bible in one year: keeping up with this one. I usually read between 5-6am when Baby Bear has his waking time.
In depth book study: I want to study Ephesians and James in more detail this year but haven’t made the time to even begin reading them. Adding it to my “to do” list and I’ll start my first read through of Ephesians next week.
Focused Daily prayer time: I have been partially doing this one during my morning quiet/Baby Bear awake time, after reading my daily Bible passage. But I think I would like to make a more specific prayer prompter.

Wife:

Monthly “out” date: We actually had our date last night. A late dinner while a friend watched our sleeping older children. It was great to be out with him but I think that, for February, we will go somewhere a little more quiet.
Doing something together: We have been learning about Queens of old through reading and watching biographical movies. It might not sound fun to everyone but it’s been a great bonding experience for us to talk about historical politics and lifestyles.
Kiss daily: Most days I do this. There are days when we barely see each other and I need to make it more of a priority on those busy days.

Mother:

Play: I have chosen to give up my best housework hours of the morning and spend that time playing with my kids instead. We have read countless stories, played playdough, done paper crafts, raced cars, gone for farm walks, and more. I’ve never been much of “playful” mother but it has blessed them to have my focused attention for that time and it has reminded me that it’s okay to “let down my hair” once in a while, so to speak.
Their faith: We forgot to read the Bible at dinner for a couple weeks but have started that up again. I bought The Narrated Bible in Chronological Order (NIV) as a family Christmas gift and we read a chunk every night after dinner. Still working on making it a firm habit but we’ve read as a family more often this month that we did all last year. I have never read the Bible in chronological order before and it’s such a different experience.

Homemaker:

Housekeeping: This is tough with a little one who takes much of my time and attention but the house is livable and we have food and clean clothes. My goal for the year is to get back into my regular cleaning rhythm. I have all my routines typed up and, at this point, am focusing on completing my Monday tasks consistently every week.
Food: We stuck to our goal of not eating out (except our date last night) so I’m planning an evening of freezer cooking for sometime in February. I also want to make bread and homemade yogurt once a month and accomplished both of those.
Project: Last month was kids’ clothes and a friend came over to help me power through the mountain and sort them all into storage bins. February’s project will be to set up and use a digital organization system. I bought an instructional book, called Paperless Home Organization: How to Create A Digital Home Management Binder that I’m working through and, so far, it’s great. By the end of February I should have my email inboxes, Evernote, and calendar organized.

Hobbies/Blog/Personal:

Reading: I have started keeping track of the books I’ve read and have a goal to read two non-fiction books per month and one fiction. I’m currently exceeding that goal because I sit to nurse or rock so often. I just keep my tablet and ereader beside the rocking chair.
Writing: My goal is to create a daily writing habit. So far I’m writing about 2-3 times per week so I’m halfway there.
Website: One “tweak” per month. In January I updated my “About Me” page and keep your eyes open for my February tweak of a new header.
Blog: Continue guest posting at TOTS Family and consistently post once per week. I hope to increase my personal posting frequency but, in this season of my life, it just isn’t realistic. So, for now, I’ll post once per week with the occasional “wild card” thrown in.
Plan to plan: Take an hour each week away from the kids to plan and prepare for the upcoming week. This could be a simple sanity saver for me but I just haven’t been doing it. I have just added it to my calendar (that syncs with my husband’s) and even added a reminder so both my phone and tablet will let me know to actually do it.
Quiet time: As an introvert, I crave quiet. I have moments when my house is quiet but it is very rare that my mind is quiet. I am trying to make a habit to take just a minute or two of outer and inner quiet during the day. I did this several times over the last month but need to make it a regular part of my daily routine.
Health: My goal to drink more water has been going well but my goal to eat a piece of fruit every day is not. I don’t naturally eat fruit in the winter so I’m going to continue working on this habit.

A couple things that I have yet to do for January that will get bumped to next week: get money out of the bank for church donation, and do some research on exercises to strengthen my core and hopefully eliminate my back issues this year.

If you have written a post on your goals, share your post by linking up. Grab the button and put it on your post to help spread the word and let’s help each other stay accountable. This linky party goes up the last Friday of the month and stays open for a few weeks. So feel free to link up or le me know in the comments how you are doing with your goals this year!

P is for Playdough: Pursuing a Child’s Heart

P is for Playdough: Pursuing a Child’s Heart

How I'm pursuing the hearts of my children through playdough

It isn’t hard to make play dough. It uses very few ingredients and takes only about 10 minutes from start to finish and provides countless hours of fun for my kids. So why do I make such a big deal over it?

I asked myself these questions last week as I watched my boys try to stick together play dough that was half dried out and kept falling apart.

My list of excuses:
I’m so tired today.
I’ll make some later today.
l doubt I have the right ingredients.
They will want to help and I’ll have a big mess to clean up.
They are still enjoying the crumbly stuff.

The truth:
I’m tired everyday.
I most likely wouldn’t get around to it later.
I probably do have ingredients and the least I could do is check.
So? There is going to be mess made today anyway If not in the kitchen, then in other areas of the house.
It would make them so happy to have new playdough that is easier for them to build things with.

As I had that inner dialogue and shot down each of my own excuses, I prayed. I asked God for the energy and oomph to to get out of the rocking chair, lay down my sleeping baby (and be okay with the fact that he would likely wake up sooner than if I was holding him) and go to my kitchen. I don’t always listen to God’s prompting but then I was reminded by a still, small Voice that, last month, I made a commitment to pursue the hearts of my children.

So I did it.

I’m sure there was just as much cheering in Heaven as there was in my house when the boys discovered what I was doing. Cheering for their happiness as well as cheering for my small triumph. God even blessed me with Baby Bear sleeping in his seat for awhile so I resisted the temptation to check a few things off of my to do list so I could play with my bigger boys. After I had rocked Baby Bear back to sleep, I had the entertainment of 2 little boys and their creative imaginations:

There were 10 invisible puppies involved who lived in the wall and got a ride to town for ice cream in Bumblebee and Heatwave (affiliate link to a couple of my kids’ favorite gifts from this past Christmas). Biscuit even asked the puppies to help him put the playdough away at tidy time. He held the bag open for them to put the playdough in. It was great in theory but then the puppies jumped in the bag instead. They only came out to jump on Papa Bear’s head and eat ice cream. The puppies have visited every day since then and continue to be a great source of imaginative play, even without the playdough.

Another benefit of making playdough that day is the renewed motivation it gave me to spend purposeful time with my children, in their world. They have asked me more often these last days to play with them. And I’ve been saying “yes” more often (though I did have to draw the line at digging in the giant snow pile because it just doesn’t seem safe to do that with Baby Bear in the sling).

I’m pursuing the hearts of my children by having a daily focus time, joining them in whatever they are playing. And you know what? I’m relearning how to play and it’s kind of fun!

What kind of play have you joined your children in lately?

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